Just Me!

Simply Put...

2011-09-19T18:30:00.000-07:00

Relationships aren't easy. I've seen the ups and downs of everyone around me and the struggles within their relationships. I have my own. It takes work, understanding, patience and forgiveness. Most of all it takes communication. While not all of these areas have come easily in my relationship, I have always been treated respectfully, never talked down to, never made fun of, accepted 100% for me the way I am. I have a very sweet, gentle, giving guy. He even cleans without being asked.

I know no relationship is is easy. I'll take the trials we have any day over being made to feel less than important or loved or respected. It's invaluable to me that through it all, ups and downs that I am emotionally, mentally, and physically treated with so much love!

Happiness is a by-product of an effort to make someone else happy. ~Gretta Brooker Palmer

2011-09-09T20:40:00.000-07:00

I have been thinking about "happiness" lately. Happiness is different for every person. For some it's sourced from their family, friends, God, religion, success, job etc. Everyone's perception of happiness is different too. For example, I don't source happiness from a job, or my car or success. Having those things make me happy, but I don't source my sense of happiness and who I am from these things.

You see, things add to my happiness but aren't what I live for and why I want to wake up every day. When I'm feeling down and out, my family and friends and faith and prayers keep me going. I always remind myself that even though things suck at the moment, it ALWAYS works out. One thing I have learned is to be grateful for my trials. I do believe that we will never be given something we can't handle. I've survived some pretty terrible things in my life. I have felt lower than low and almost got in my car and drove away from everyone I knew. I used to scratch my arms to the point of almost causing them to bleed! I was told I was doing what cutters do but without cutting myself. I was manifesting physically, what I felt emotionally. I will never forget those feelings. Most of these things were triggered by inner struggle and the fear of choosing what I needed to do for me, and NOT worrying about everyone else.

It took me 4, VERY long, grueling months of counseling. Endless tears, anger, reliving things I had suppressed for years. I knew I had to face the ugly. I was ready. And you know what, it wasn't easy but so completely worth it.

I feel alive again. I am happy, to the core. It doesn't mean life doesn't suck and I don't have bad days. But in the end, take away everything I have and as long as I have my family, friends and the ability to pray, I'll be okay! And I'll be happy.

I feel terribly sad for those out there who cannot source happiness from within, from their faith and relationship with God or have something at the center of the heart and mind that offers up genuine happiness.

I feel that happiness closely correlates with gratitude. Those who aren't grateful seem to be the most miserable people I've met in my personal experience. People want to have bigger and better "things" and go into great amounts of debt for them. People want to be skinnier, prettier, more popular, rich and/or famous. Some think another human being in their life will fulfill them and make them happy, or having a child or a yacht. It's simply an unhealthy outlook to not be grateful for what is given to us, to continually want more than we have and to forget to acknowledge God in our lives.

I read in my Psych 100 class that the best cure for depression is service. Is this not a principle that the Savior himself lived? Forget about yourself, take time daily to list the blessings and gifts granted to us. And in those really dark moments, and believe me I've had some, sometimes the only thing you might be able to be grateful for is the fact you're breathing. But it's another day to better ourselves, educate ourselves, help each other out and LIVE!

This topic is on my mind with significant amounts of my brain being sucked up in thought about this because I have a sibling that suffers greatly from lack of happiness. As much as I get angry about it, at the end of the day, it's really that I'm very sad for this person and wish I could make it better. Sometimes, all we can do is pray for others.

I can't imagine waking up each day and feeling unhappy. I am grateful that is not a burden I have to carry.

Most people would rather be certain they're miserable, than risk being happy. ~Robert Anthony

Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it. ~Fyodor Dostoevsky

People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they're not on your road doesn't mean they've gotten lost. ~H. Jackson Browne

Indeed, man wishes to be happy even when he so lives as to make happiness impossible. ~St. Augustine

A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery while on a detour. ~Author Unknown

He is rich or poor according to what he is, not according to what he has. ~Henry Ward Beecher

Kennewick, Kids, and men Oh my!

2011-09-05T10:58:00.001-07:00

I've had a wonderful weekend down here in Kennewick! Lot's of loves and snuggles and laughing and giggly little girls. I won't say I'm caught up on sleep because I have this very cute, 5 year old with big brown eyes who likes to snuggle up with me for the nights when I'm here.. well... she snores, breathes loudly cause she has a constant stuffy nose and she kicks me in my ribs an butt on and off throughout the night... and I wouldn't give it up for anything! These are the memories that just add on to my inner happiness... and in the moments when I don't feel so happy, I dig in to my "Auntie bucket."

Last night while I was trying to fall asleep, I stared off into the darkness full of memories of living here before. I moved to Kennewick in September of 2009. The first part of that year was tough. I went to counseling for 4 months and came out of it feeling like an entirely different woman.

Summer of 2009 was fun and I reconnected with some people I knew from when I was younger. My first night in Kennewick was fun. DeAnne and her family were in Spokane and I had the house to myself. I talked on the phone with a friend and the rest is history. Fall of 2009 to fall of 2010 was so fun! Life-changing. I felt alive! I was free, happy, and uninhibited in a way...

Alaina was a newborn baby. Kate was 3 and loved doing homework with me. I remember doing homework and sitting on my big bouncy ball/desk chair and bouncing lil Alaina to sleep. I loved helping Big D out and being an Aunt fills that "mommy" in me. Child birth terrifies me! I can't imagine. Ugh!

Kennewick was good for me. I really found myself and that year of my life offers some of my happiest moments and memories. I'm grateful for my friend that was a huge part of my life then, and I'm grateful for my little babies that make my heart smile!

Being and Aunt is the next best thing!

Life is too short!

2011-09-04T18:40:00.000-07:00

I sit here, in the last quarter of the year and have the same feelings and thoughts I get every year. The end of year is one of my favorite times in a year. I love the cool, crisp feeling of the fall air. I LOVE Christmas music and I LOVE Christmas. You know, the time of year that we celebrate the birth of Christ?... When communities come together and help take care of each other.

I love the holidays and I think that I still have my youthful, innocent hope of these times. Why innocence? Because every year these feelings of overwhelming happiness come around. And every year, they seem to be shot to hell in a hand basket real quick!

When I think of the holidays, I think of family. I grew up in a religion that family is one of the MAIN points of this life and the next. I don't think that's the case in my family most of the time! While I am not perfect, I am inactive from church, and I'm single, there is nothing more important to me than family and sometimes I wonder if my family remembers the teachings of the scriptures and the prophets.

Now I realize that when someone gets married, that family becomes priority. Maybe because I am still unmarried, do I still look forward to my family getting together. I look so forward to Thanksgiving and Christmas gatherings. I think about when I was a kid and the fun times. Getting up in the middle of night and undoing our stockings. I remember sitting in the living room and talking with my siblings all night, enjoying the Christmas lights. I remember we weren't allowed to wake the parents up before 6am. I have fond memories of Christmas and always want to make new, happy memories each year.

It seems this is not ever going to happen in my family again. We've gone from being a blended, strange mixture of people being kids, to grown-ups with their own kids and all but hating other family members for various reasons. It seems like my mom especially, can do no right in people's eyes. Siblings can't stand each other for various reasons, and some just seem to get snottier and "better" than the rest of us as each year continues. I feel that some in-laws think their family is better than ours and would rather stick fire-burning coals in their eyes than spend time with my family! We as adults, can't get past our differences for even 3 hours out of one day in a year! Most of us don't even call each other anymore. So Christmas gathering is a bunch of already pissed off adults before they walk through the doors, dreading seeing the family member they can't stand the most, waiting for some drama moment to happen, sitting there with attitude and watching the clock til this has to end, unhappy, un-christian like adults. HOW SAD and SHAMEFUL!

I realize we aren't gonna all see eye to eye all the time. We all choose to live our lives how we see fit for us. That's fine. But WHY can't we all put our differences aside and put the spirit of Christ and of Christmas in our hearts and enjoy a beautiful, short amount of time with each other?

The Savior, family and eternity, service, love one another, bear each others burdens.... all of these are values that are instilled and ingrained in us as members of the church. You can all sit and think I'm a hypocrite for sighting these things since I don't go to church. No I'm not perfect and I don't pretend I am. No I don't go to church,but before you all sit in judgment of me and my post and get pissed about it, how about a little self-reflection first.

I would love to sit with my parents, siblings, and nieces and nephews and be HAPPY!!!! Watch the kids all play with each other, enjoy the music of the season... Is it really so hard to put on a smile, come with a good attitude rather than one of dread (which I'm just as guilty of in the past) and have fun! Crap, we can't even have a peaceful white elephant gift exchange without someone getting pissed.

My resolve this year is to have fun, show up with a positive attitude and enjoy the little time that my family actually will spend together for a few hours out of 365 days with each other. Life is too short! I love my family and imperfect and silly as each of us are! I wouldn't trade it for any other family!

A dying Education in America

2011-06-22T07:09:00.001-07:00

Higher Education: The dying American Dream

"The principle goal of education in the schools should be creating men and women who are capable of doing new things, not simply repeating what other generations have done; men and women who are creative, inventive and discoverers, who can be critical and verify, and not accept, everything they are offered." ~ Jean Piaget

As a young girl, when asked what I wanted to be when I grow up, I always replied, “I want to be a mom and have 100 kids.” As I pressed on through my education that is required as an American, I never had the desire to go to college. I was a great student, loved to learn, loved to read and did well in school. I did not even take the SAT’s because I knew I was not going to pursue higher education. Out of high school, I received a promotion into management at Godfather’s Pizza when I was 18 years old. From the restaurant industry, I went to retail, which finally led me to the wonderful world of dentistry. As a 22 year old, I was running a 1.5 million dollar dental practice in Park City, UT. This is where I developed my love for developing teams, helping to staff properly, teach employers to value their employees and receive a great return on investment, as well as teaching customer service. This in turn set me on my way in my life. I moved to Spokane in 2005 and began employment at an Orthodontic office to staff and increase revenue. I worked in the office for five years. In my fourth year at the office, I realized that I love working with people. I enjoyed educating providers how to run a business and building a team that produced and worked cohesively. I was offered a consulting job with a well-known orthodontic consulting firm. However, they wanted me to finish my education first. I was excited to be in college. My second year into my higher and education, and I feel as if I am being set up for failure.

I made enough money that I do not qualify for financial assistance. Yet, I do not make enough to be able to provide for myself and pay for the cost of tuition, books and fees. I am only attending community college, so you can imagine the cost that waits upon completion of my AA degree. In America, as high school students we are taught that the key to our future is higher education. What we as high school and college students in America are not aware of is the political dysfunction that is taking place in the education system and setting us up for failure. Thanks to George W. Bush’s No Child Left Behind, teachers of primary education are being forced into teaching to standardized tests; higher education is mainly being paid for by student loans, and in today’s economy, the student loan bubble is well on its way to burst. This is not comforting news to me, as a single woman, wanting to feel confident that I can secure a good education and be able to provide for myself in the future.

In a fascinating and infuriating article by Chris Hedges in 2010 titled, Why the US is destroying its education system, Hedges says, “A nation that destroys its systems of education, degrades its public information, guts its public libraries and turns its airwaves into vehicles for cheap, mindless amusement becomes deaf, dumb and blind. It prizes test scores above critical thinking and literacy. It celebrates rote vocational training and the singular, amoral skill of making money. It churns out stunted human products, lacking the capacity and vocabulary to challenge the assumptions and structures of the corporate state. It funnels them into a caste system of drones and systems managers. It transforms a democratic state into a feudal system of corporate masters and serfs. Teachers, their unions under attack, are becoming as replaceable as minimum-wage employees at Burger King. We spurn real teachers—those with the capacity to inspire children to think, those who help the young discover their gifts and potential—and replace them with instructors who teach to narrow, standardized tests. These instructors obey. They teach children to obey. And that is the point. The No Child Left Behind program, modeled on the “Texas Miracle,” is a fraud. It worked no better than our deregulated financial system. But when you shut out debate these dead ideas are self-perpetuating.” Teachers are not granted the freedom to ask or challenge the testing. A teacher or anyone for that matter that thinks for themselves are systematically weeded out. The value of education no longer rests on the education itself but on the corporations who grant schools money. You bet they want a return on their investment. Most kids in the US that graduate are considered functionally literate and can hardly solve basic math equations. Teachers and education are under assault. Those whom do not comply or prove difficult in this new age of teaching are replaced with young, inexperienced teachers who are willing to perform under these tragic conditions and are “grateful” to have a job.

Where has the value of education gone? Schools run by superintendents who are making a great deal of money, teachers are leaving the profession as they see the value of education decreasing. Their jobs are on the line if their students do not pass bubble tests. A teacher interviewed for this article refused to give his name, as he feared repercussions says, “You have to ask yourself why are hedge fund managers suddenly so interested in the education of the urban poor? The main purpose of the testing craze is not to grade the students but to grade the teacher.” So students are being sent out into the world, unprepared, undereducated and products of corporate greed and ignorant politicians and sent on to the next chapter in their lives, which for many is higher education. The question is do they truly know what issues lay ahead in obtaining their higher education in pursuit of securing a successful, financial future.

The student loan industry is large, growing and most of the students in college are in debt. Alan Nasser says, “Debt is held by 62 percent of students enrolled at public colleges and universities, 72 percent at private non-profit schools and 96 percent at private, for-profit schools.” As of the summer of 2010, student loan debt is at $830 billion, surpassing credit card debt, which is at $827 billion. Student debt is growing at $90 billion per year. Lenders make their money from student loans when the borrowers default on their loans. They count on defaulted loans. The Secretary of Education, Margaret Spellings announced in September 2008 “for community college students, the prospect of default is between 32 and 42 percent. Students at for-profit schools, the expected default is between 39 and 51 percent.” The price of tuition is increasing, Pell Grants are decreasing and the only option left is take on heavy amounts of student debt. In 2009, about 100 students protested the 32 percent hike in tuition at UCLA, Berkley. In the following spring quarter, an additional $585 would be added to tuition, prior to another scheduled increase in the fall of $1,344. In addition, the students had parents, members of the community, activists and union members all join totaling around 2,000 people. Police arrested about 50 of these students. Students are realizing exactly how powerless they really are in their own education.

Public education on every level is part of the capitalist state. In an article by the Socialist Labor Party of America we read, “One might think this would provide the capitalist class with a powerful motivation to exert great pressure on the state to preserve and improve on the quality of public education and to keep the meddlers out. Indeed, a great racket has been raised about how new technology is revolutionizing industry at all levels, and of the need for a new generation of workers trained and disciplined to operate them. What better motivation do the corporate owners of the country’s industries need to exert that pressure than their demand for workers capable of being employed and exploited? To understand the apparent contradiction it is only necessary to remember that “new technology” and “labor-displacing technology” are two names for the same thing. Capitalists need a new generation of workers to exploit, but not necessarily an entire generation. Automation means that fewer workers will be needed to operate the new industries. As for the rest of the new generation, capitalism will have no use for them.” If you have read Huxley’s A Brave New World, this sounds all too familiar. America is going to turn out workers who will benefit society and are trained to certain jobs.

Thirty years ago, Pell Grants covered up to 77% of a public four-year education. Today it covers about 35 percent. Low and middle-income students are finding it difficult to pursue higher education. Jesse Jackson said, “We can lose a greedy bank more than we can lose a generation of needy students.” Tolu Olorunda says, “These trends have abandoned most students at the mercy of five options: 1.) Drop out and transfer to a community college. 2.) Pick up a second job. 3.) Quit schooling altogether. 4.) Bear the brunt temporarily and hope a degree pays off in the long run. 5.) Take direct, non-violent action.” How are any of these acceptable solutions? He says most students pick option one or option four. The problem with this is that no matter what, once you acquire student loan debt, it is impossible to get rid of it. Bankruptcy is not an option if you do not finish school or become unemployed.

Tuition is rising in a time when our economy and income are declining. Of the $830 billion in student loan debt, about 40 percent is being repaid. The rest is in default. With the difficulty of procuring employment, rises in tuition, increase in student debt, it is safe to say that this debt bubble is set to burst soon. Two out of every five students is in default on their student loans within 15 years of the loans being issued. The “bubble effect” comes into play by not requiring credit checks to those who wish to apply for student loan funding. It is expected, in fact, hoped that students will default on their loans. This is how the banks make their money. Loaning money to anyone without prime qualifications is called subprime lending. We saw this with the housing bubble. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics in December 2009, “most of the jobs will be low paying and will not require a bachelor’s degree.” One would think that the government would reflect and become involved in this arena. However, it is not just private loan lenders that freely give out money, the federal government does the same. The Department of Education makes more on defaulted loans than it does on loans is good standing. The government wants to make a profit as much as the next dirty, private lender next door. In August 2009, Congress passed the Student Aid and Fiscal Responsibility Act. This eliminated private lenders from federal student loans and since then, private companies are raking it in. Sallie Mae’s loan portfolio grew 87 percent from 2000 to 2005. During that time, its fee income grew by 228 percent.

These are frightening facts that should cause alarm. Why aren’t more American students educated on this topic? Why are we not banning together, protesting and taking a stand? Why do we not demand a cap on tuition? I myself have tried to weigh out the consequences of borrowing in order to pay for my tuition. The very thought makes me sick. I find myself asking if it really is worth it. Prior to attending college, I had a great paying job with great benefits. I find myself in the category of sticking it out and continuing my education and hoping that it will pay for itself when I am done. It is likely that I will have to have at least two jobs upon completion of college. What is disturbing is that the value of education in this country is declining. As we know from the UCLA protests, it is easier to get thrown in jail, or even complain about the teaching styles and have a teacher fired than it is to stand up for our rights and demand a great education with affordability and an out if needed. We cannot file bankruptcy on student loans. I read about a woman whose loan payment was at $865 per month after defaulting. How is this not criminal? What are we as students and Americans going to do about this? Starting with primary education, we should fight on behalf of the teachers and our children. We should not allow the dictation of greed and standardized tests to be acceptable education for our future. We should follow suit of other countries and rally and protest in mass to demand equality for education and cap tuition. We as students feel powerless. We can complain about a teacher who presents views, opinions, theories and political propaganda that is different to ours and put an end to his or her career at a school. How is it that we are so powerless to have a voice and stand up to the greedy politicians and corporate greed about securing our future? How as parents, do you accept that your children’s educational and financial future is in severe jeopardy? Even peaceful protests result in arrests. Whatever happened to freedom of speech in this country?

Olorunda says, “But the struggle to lift burdens weighing heavy on the backs of students would have to involve more than young people: it would take the sympathy and sensitivity of adult working hand-in-hand, side-by-side with tomorrow’s leaders. It would take the empathy and energy of courageous intellectuals to step out beyond the academic bubble and stand for something worth more than a corporate handout. It would take the unwavering support of parent, community leaders, and educators to make good on the hope harbored in the mind of young people—hope that the society in which they live cares deeply about the future awaiting them.” I fear that too many American’s, young and old, feel that it does not affect them personally and are apathetic in regards to the situation. We have an attitude of, “If it does not affect me, it is not my concern.” This is a shame! It was not okay for the housing market and the same attention and concern must be given to the future leaders and stability of the American society. America is already falling behind in Math and Science skills. Where we once ranked number one we are now ranked number nine. Immanuel Kant says, “What brings us meaning and worth as human beings is our ability to stand up and pit ourselves against injustice and the vast, moral indifference of the universe. Once justice perishes, life loses all meaning. Those who meekly obey laws and rules imposed from the outside—including religious laws—are not moral human beings. The fulfillment of an imposed law is morally neutral. The truly educated make their own wills serve the higher call of justice, empathy and reason.” We need to revamp the educational system back to its roots. A student’s curriculum should include all areas of study including the arts, music and philosophy. We should not be cutting the funding for education and encouraging and accepting the massive debt of the leaders of our future. We are seeking education and it is time we serve that higher call of justice.

Movin... again...

2010-11-11T17:13:00.000-08:00

Welp! It's officially one month until I move back to Spokane! I'm pretty excited. Looking forward to what the next year will bring. Glad to be close to family and friends while I finish my AA at SFCC. I always love a new adventure.. guess that's why I like moving around so much. But, I will be in Spokane til I'm officially done with my AA. Then, depending on where life is at... I may end up back in Vancouver, or Pullman to finish my B.S. Degree in Personnel Psychology and Human Resources Management.

Math sucks! It's gonna take forever to complete it all before I can get on to my exciting classes at WSU!

Oh well... Here's to the next adventure in life! :-D

Dang!

2010-09-29T23:17:00.000-07:00

I can't believe it's been since March since I posted! Wow!!!!

Well, in a nut shell. I'm in Vancouver, WA attending school at Clark Community. I opted not to go to WSU without my AA cause it's way more expensive and I'd have to take a ton of their General Ed requirements that would otherwise be waived if I have my AA.

Over Memorial Day weekend I met Morgan. Things have been going well and got a lot more serious when I decided to move. So, it's highly likely that I will be moving back to Spokane after this 1 quarter here so that he and I can actually date and see where it goes. But for now, I'm like a giddy school girl after I talk to him on the phone. I'm looking forward to spending a weekend with him in October! He really is super sweet to me! He gets annoyed that I don't ask for help with carrying bags to my car and things like that. But I have to assure him it's because I've single forever and not used to having help. I told him it wasn't some "independent, feminist things." heehee

Anyway, it's great!!! I'm happy. Couldn't ask for a sweeter guy who treats me well!

This quarter is Biology, Health, and Math! It's a full quarter and I'm glad I have so much to focus on to make my time not seem so long before I get back to my family, friends and delicious, good chocolate man!

WOW!

2010-03-17T22:26:00.001-07:00

I'm not really sure why I EVER thought I wanted to pursue Accounting. It's just not in me. I may actually fail the class this quarter. Now, in the big picture, it's not a class I need to have since I have changed my major from a Business major to a Social Science major... in the smaller picture, it means I will have FAILED and that doesn't taste good!

I have never wanted a quarter to be over as much as I do this one! Next quarter won't be any less stressful, but I won't be spending 5 hours a night on Accounting homework!

I am enrolled in Spanish, a Multi-Cultural Communications class and a Human Relations class. I'm trying to get into an English class, but so far, they are filled.

I will start school at 6:50am and get done at 10:10am each day. (No Friday's) Then I will work until 5. Now that's all fine and dandy, but I start rehearsals for the musical play Rent on May 17th. The rehearsals will be on weeknights and I am going to be one tired chica!

But, it is an experience I am very much looking forward to. My first, real play!

:-D

2010-02-14T15:06:00.000-08:00

Man, life is crazy sometimes. I seriously can't keep up with myself at times. School is crazy busy. Accounting is so time consuming for homework.
Next quarter is gonna be even worse. Very long days, but my last quarter of Accounting. Hallelujah! I am not going to pursue Accounting as my major. I have found my dream major though.
I never thought I would be "that kid" that changed career choices several times. I started out wanting to do HR, then switched to Accounting. I have always, always loved Psychology, but don't want to be a Psychologist for a living. So, in doing several weeks of research, I found it! BS in Personnel Psychology and Human Resources Management. I am still doing a lot of research on this program, looking into the courses that accompany it and all. But it DOES combine Psychology classes with Business classes. If I get a minor, it will be in Business Administration. (I'm pretty sure I will do a minor though) I feel really positive about my future as a student. Like I said, lots of research still going into it.
The rest of my life is pretty good. Just wish I could find the courage and the right words to address a certain something, but other than that, I'm pretty happy.
I don't know what the future holds, where I'll end up and when, but I am excited for the unknown about it. I am nervous and excited to start school at the University level. That is no joke! Lot's of classes, much harder studies.... but so worth it!
Here's to looking to the future with positivity and the strength and courage to do what I need to do to fulfill my goals.

2010

2010-01-08T21:34:00.000-08:00

I have officially completed my first week of the Winter Quarter. This quarter I'm taking Accounting 202, Intro to Theatre (history course) and Micro Economics. It's a full load that's for sure. But, I really enjoy all my teachers.

I was just offered a job with Inspired Solutions as the Branch Supervisor for the Kennewick office. It's the same company my brother in law Jeff works for. I'm really excited to learn a new industry. The owners I interviewed with are pretty cool people. I think I'm really gonna like the company.
Also, they have been super cool and supportive of me continuing my schooling. I'm pretty blessed to have a brand new employer be supportive and work around the hours.

With that being said, since it's not job some "little ol' job" I will be staying in Kennewick for my BA in Accounting, at WSU Tri-Cities campus. It wouldn't be right for me to accept a supervisory position and leave the company within 6 months to a year.

I am excited for what the year will bring. I feel really positive and happy about the future.

Moving on, hopefully up...

2009-12-08T20:52:00.000-08:00

So I will officially not be working at Slack & Combs after this month. I have been on the job hunt here in Kennewick for a about 2 weeks. I am not finding anyone who wants to hire me part time, so I have come to terms with the fact that I will probably work full time and go to school full time. People do it all the time, so I just get to man up and deal.
I have applied for a few positions that I would really like. One is a management position for a Spa. That could have some great benefits... i.e. massage, facial, pedi's.. you know.
The next is a Human Resource Coordinator. It pays very well and keeps me in the field in which I want to work when schooling is done.
Third is an Accounting Technician. Not an accountant. This would be awesome since I am going into Accounting as my major.
I just pray daily that I'll be guided to the right position. I ask for your prayers too.
The ending with my current job was kind of abrupt and unplanned, but everything happens for a reason. I really believe that.
I'm coming to the close of this quarter and couldn't be happier about it. I can't stand my Sociology class or the way it's taught. Kind of disappointing since I love that stuff. But had a different teacher taught it, I probably would have liked it more. Oh well. Almost done.
So next quarter, as of now, unless I get a job that requires me to re-arrange all my classes(most likely to happen) will be Accounting 202, Intro to Theatre (satisfies my history requirement and doesn't involve acting) and Economics 201..
Busy schedule with a lot of work...
I'm looking forward to the new year and gearing up for it to be crazy busy...

Running

2009-11-12T17:24:00.000-08:00

Right now, I just wanna go somewhere tropical for a few weeks, be one with nature, and pretend to figure things out.....

WOW!

2009-10-10T01:03:00.000-07:00

So I've been in school now for 3 weeks. My day starts at about 6:15am. My first class is at 8:00am. It's my Business Law class. My teacher is pretty wild! He is a 62 year old man and is a retired lawyer. He prefers teaching to practicing law. He says he lives in Texas still, but lives in Kennewick for the school year. He is really different from any teacher I've had ever. He likes to press buttons, bring up "hot" issues and swears in class. Everyday I find myself thinking, "My mom would chew this guy out!" He told us the first day of class that he's a "hippie, commie liberal" and sometimes likes to use expletives to explain things. He says that sometimes a good expletive just makes the point better than any other word in the dictionary. Now, I personally find him quite amusing. I kind of like that he is so outside the box. He really makes you think about things from all angles, as opposed to letting a person stay in their own box of ideals. I also find the class material pretty fascinating as well.

Then, at 9:10am, I have my Spanish class. My teacher is fluent in Spanish and French. She is very energetic and fun.

I have both of these classes Monday through Thursday. On Monday and Wednesday nights, from 5:00pm to 7:00pm, I have my Sociology class. I'm not a fan of evening classes and won't do them again! We cover a chapter per class.

All of my classes are very vocab intense and cover a lot of material. I feel pretty overwhelmed with the amount of material and homework we have. And I thought my Accounting class was gonna be the death of me! Wrong!!!!

My days consist of school, going home and working for the office, then on to school work. All mixed in with helping DeAnne with the girls. (Which is my favorite part of course)

It's been good so far, even with the stress of school. Now I'm just waiting for my school loan to come through and my 401K to get transferred to my IRA.

After that, things shouldn't feel quite so stressful.

I'm glad I moved and know I made the right decision for me! I can't believe it's already mid-October. My how time flies!

Labor Day Fun

2009-09-08T12:47:00.000-07:00

On Friday I went to Kennewick to take my last load of personal stuff over. Abby and I stayed the night and hung out with Kate and Alaina, chatted with D!

Saturday afternoon, we took off to Vancouver. Checked into the hotel and decided to take a little siesta before going out for the evening. We met up with my friend Ericka and her friend Jenny and grabbed an appetizer at a place called Henry's in downtown Portland. Very delicious! From Henry's, we went to a lounge called Candy. We chose this lounge for it's "diversity" of men. A few of us ladies love the chocolate men! :-D

We spent the next couple hours dancing our rear's off! Now let me try to set the scene. Candy is very long, but not really wide. So the dance floor is pretty small which I prefer when dancing. However, a couple different times during the night, as the 4 of us were enjoying ourselves, some gross person decided to let off a stink bomb. The first time we all were graced with the foul smell, it was as if it went in my mouth. I almost gagged!!!!!! Seriously people, why????? Go to the bathroom!

Anyway, after about 2 hours of steady dancin, we were all ready to head out! It was a very fun night with some great eye candy. And this one chocolately man, smelled super delicious!!! WOW! That's a breath of fresh air after the butt bombs were dropped!

Sunday, Abby and I just chilled mostly. We went out to eat at Chevy's---- Amazing mushroom and artichoke enchilada's! Fresh guac! Oh my!!!!

Sadly, we wasted our money on the movie "All about Steve" but enjoyed the scenery as we drove to the theatre in Battleground, WA. (I didn't even know we had a town by that name)

As usual, I was very sad to leave Portland and look forward to moving there in the future!

Movin on up!!!

2009-09-04T22:14:00.001-07:00

I have all of my things down in Kennewick now. Spent tonight startin to put my room together. It's cute! I love the dark brown accent wall with my new bedding!!!! Too fun!

I start school on the 21st. I have a rowsing Business Law Class (eye roll) at 8am. Then Spanish 201 at 9:10. That's Monday thru Thursday. Then on Monday and Wednesday nights, I have a Sociology class from 5:00 to 7:10.

I'm excited to get back in school and get my brain workin again! Lookin forward to meeting new people. And I'm really excited that I am only 3 1/2 hours away from Seattle and Portland! That makes me giddy!!!!!!!!!!

New School

2009-07-21T16:52:00.001-07:00

Well.... it's official! I have enrolled for school at Columbia Basin College. I'll be taking Business Law (snore), Spanish 101 and Accounting 202!

Now that campus is much, much larger than SFCC, and somehow, all 3 of my classes are in the same building! My Spanish and Accounting classes are right next door to each other. A-maz-za-aing! I thought I was gonna twist an ankle trying to run my chubby self all of heck and back, with a 60 pound back pack! Thank goodness no one will have to witness that site!

Anyway, I'm anxious to get out of Spokane and meet new people! The summer has been fun, but I already have to start catching up, or should I say, refreshing myself with all the Accounting formula's I learned last quarter. Sheesh it goes away fast when you don't have to use it everyday!

Grades!

2009-06-10T19:00:00.000-07:00

I have a week of school left! I am so ready for it to be done. I currently have a 3.9 in my accounting class, and 1 test left to take! I am praying I'll do okay tomorrow on that quiz.

I have my first aid final on my birthday, AND I have no idea what my grade is in that class. The teacher likes to hear herself talk, and is really irritating. Hope I pass!

My music class is good. I have a 4.0 in that class. I have 4 different parts to that final, including a 5 paragraph essay. ewwww

I'm looking very forward to having a ton of fun this summer and gettin brown and beautiful!

So Many Options!

2009-06-04T15:27:00.000-07:00

So, an update on the continuing school saga! Last week I talked with Dr. Combs and told her my plans to move to Tri-cities. As suspected, she was super cool about it all. She said I could still work for her and go to school. I will just take my office laptop with me and do everything remote. It's great!!! At first we talked about just working about 15-20 a month, but the more she kept thinking, the more she realized, I can do everything but interact with the staff, remotely.

Soooo, she offered to let me work 20 hours a week, which will allow for me to keep my full medical/dental benefits.

I can't stress how blessed I am to work for her. She values me, I love working for her, and she really values education as well! It's great because I still get to keep my position, and do staff meetings and the staff retreats etc. I love what I do but can't do it full time, while trying to do really well in school.

So, if I can get registered in time, I am going to move to Kennewick this fall instead of waiting til January! (It would have been fun to bond with you for a couple months though, Crystyne!)

Happy Summer Days!

Computer

2009-05-04T19:52:00.000-07:00

So here's the deal! I really, really need a new computer. I spend a good 4-5 hours a day on the computer doing homework! My computer is so old and out of date. So, I'm putting this out there for help.

I don't want a laptop because by the time I'm done with school, I'm gonna have to buy a new one. So I am looking for a PC.

I don't know much about computers. I wouldn't even know what to ask about if I called someone, and I don't want to get duped.

So, your input is being requested. What type of PC's are the best? Is there a best? Who is good to buy from? Who has great customer service if a computer illiterate person has to call for questions? Is it even possible to get an "English speaking" human on the line? (Or is that part really too much to ask for?)

Anyway, you get the idea. I'm open for suggestions.

Thanks!

WSU

2009-05-01T13:43:00.000-07:00

So I have changed my course of education. I am switching from getting my BA in Human Resources to getting my BA in Accounting. I have looked at a couple different business schools and I'm pretty sure I am going to go WSU-Tri-Cities Campus. WSU has a campus in Vancouver, WA which is where I really want to move to. However, it would be better to live with DeAnne and Justin, rather than paying all of my own living expenses, while living off of student loans.

I have found out in my search of schooling, that I must also learn a foreign language. WSU has what is called a "Global Learning Credit." This requires me to one of many different things to satisfy this credit. The only one that is feasible to me is to minor in a foreign language. So, I shall be learning to speak in Espanol! I'm excited though, because I loved my Spanish classes in high school. Besides, it's probably going to be our national language soon! That's all I'll say about that!

So, I have had to make some decisions about what is best for me and my pocketbook. My lease is over at the end of August, and the Borders have graciously offered me a room in their house. (I think Crystyne really just wants company!) Which, of course, I will be more than willing to oblige. So, in a nut shell, I'm moving out and workin on applying to WSU. I can transfer to WSU with 60 credits rather than 90 credits, which most schools require.

I'm really excited. And although working full time and going to school full time is kicking my butt, I am still lovin it! I really am quite looking forward to taking the summer off though.... not gonna lie about that!

Happy sunshine days await!

Kate

2009-04-05T17:05:00.000-07:00

Sitting pretty!

Spring

2009-04-05T16:55:00.000-07:00

I love this picutre! She was so funny last time I was over visiting. We were in her room playing with some toys, and Abby started shooting pictures. So cute. I'm glad my nieces and nephews make me so happy! An hour with one of them, and I'm much better. I'll post some more pics from that visit.

New quarter tomorrow! Math 91, Accounting 201, and a World Music class. It's going to be a big quarter. I will have lots of homework and really have no life. Maybe I'll find some more eye candy this quarter!
Anywho, if you want to see me or talk to me, you will probably have to come over to my house. That's where I'll be!

I am still in the processing of figuring me out and gaining an understanding of self. It's not been an easy process but will be worth it in the end! That's what I tell myself anyway. lol

College

2009-03-26T11:08:00.000-07:00

Well I finished my first quarter at SFCC! I am so excited that I got a 99% on my Psychology Final! I got 3 A's my first quarter and I worked full time as well. It is crazy to think 12 weeks has passed. It's been an interesting 12 weeks, I'm not gonna lie.
Next quarter I get to do Math 91 at 7:30am. Jared says the teacher I have rips on her students and calls them "idiotic" and he isn't too fond of her. I just hope she is not a cow to me! I don't need issues in a subject that I suck at! Then at 8:30am, I have the first of four Accounting classes I get to take at the Falls. And last but not least, I have an on-line class- World Music.
Here's the part that doesn't make me smile. My Tuition costs $1003. My books for Spring quarter cost $555. What the crap is that about?
I'm not sure how long I can keep up on Full Time school and Work, but school is my future at this point! I'm loving it!

The good ol' days.

2009-01-24T23:17:00.000-08:00

Thanksgiving

2008-11-14T11:15:00.000-08:00

I absolutely love this time of year! I really enjoy the red trees. So pretty.
I am very grateful for the lack of snow we have. I'm grateful for my family, friends, my great job and employer. I'm grateful for my health, to be alive, a functioning vehicle, a roof over my head, music, the gospel and my testimony. I'm grateful for trials and the lessons that I learn from them, even if it's rough during the process. That's how I have learned some great lessons in life. I'm grateful for the leaders in my ward and Brother McGrath, my home teacher.
I'm looking forward to endless Christmas music and the feeling of Christmas all over! Oh, and let's not forget all my snow men waiting to come out and play. heehee
I hope you all have a great Thanksgiving and take some time to ponder all the things you are grateful for, no matter how big or small they may be.

The Dental Assistants! Ahhh so pretty!

2008-10-23T15:30:00.000-07:00

Who would argue one of these ladies working on ya?

Pucker Up!

2008-10-23T15:27:00.000-07:00

I have an awesome staff!

Goofy staff!

2008-10-23T15:22:00.000-07:00

Staff Retreat at Dr. Combs House!

School

2008-10-09T16:51:00.000-07:00

So I have decided to go to college. At first I decided to get a two year degree, an A.A.S in General Business. So I went to SFCC to talk with a counselor about the program outline, and he was NOT helpful. I pretty much felt like I was an annoyance to him. He circled a bunch of things on the planning sheet and then handed it to me and said, "This is what you'll need to complete the course." I had also asked him to help me figure out my course if I decided to pursue a Human Resources degree. He didn't even discuss that with me at all. So, thanks to the help of Tammy, I figured out some information about the degree for Human Resources from EWU. So here's the deal.... After some research, I have decided that I am going to get my Bachelors of Arts in Business Administration:Human Resources Management. I feel really good about my decision, and feel that ultimately, this is what I want my degree in. I think it will be the most beneficial for my future career goals as well.
So I called the counseling department of SFCC back, scheduled an appointment with a different person, and will get all my details lined up. I will get my AA from the Falls with a Business emphasis and then transfer to Eastern and finish the program.
I have to admit it is very scary to me to go back to school after 10 years. I am really freaked out about math classes especially. However, I am excited that after being in Management for 10 years, I will get the education to back up my experience and really have a lot to offer future clients and/or bosses.
I will start in January and that will be the end of any sort of social life I may have, but well worth it in the end.

Edward

2008-09-03T08:30:00.000-07:00

So, I think Michelle is the only one who hasn't finished Breaking Dawn yet. So, I will still not say anything. But the book was great! AND.... the last page is so worth waiting for.

For those of you who haven't heard, on Stephanie Meyers website, she put up a post about Midnight Sun. This is the Twilight book, but Edward is telling the story, not Bella. At first I was so ticked someone would illegally post the 264 pages because now she says she will not finish the book, at least anytime soon. Then, on Sunday I decided I would just read it anyway. And it is sooooo dang good. It cuts off right before the meadow though! Anyway, I was glued to the computer for about 4 hours. It's the best. I would totally read all the books from his view if she would write them.
Needless to say, being the cynic that I am, I can't help but wonder if this is all a plot to help drive the movie sales. Stephanie says she is pretty sure she knows who leaked the copy, and that she only gave it to people she trusted. So why?.... suddenly is this person going to betray her? Maybe money, who knows.
Plot or not, it's totally worth reading. It has typo's etc. because it was no where near being finished. However, her editors are horrible anyway, and in all her printed books there are grammar and spelling errors. I guess that's why she says she's a story teller not a writer! lol
Hey, whatever works! She tells a dang good story. And I'm sure to read it again and again.

Decided and Confirmed

2008-08-15T15:53:00.000-07:00

So this past Sunday on the 10th, I decided to talk to Bishop Anderson about life's dilemma's. We talked about life, love, choices and goals. The cool thing about him is that he won't make a decision for anyone, but rather listen and help us to come to our own conclusions. After I expressed everything and I mean everything to him, he agreed with me that I should stay here and take advantage of the opportunity that Dr. Combs is offering me to stay employed and let me go to school during the day. And to keep working on all my other goals. I told him that at this point, that is what I felt was the right thing to do, but was really struggling with going against an answered prayer. He reassured me that I wasn't being disobedient to Heavenly Father's desires and he promised me that as I keep working on my goals, that everything will fall into place for me.
So, that is the long story short and I feel good about my decision, and glad to know that I am not going to be struck down! LOL
So, I will be starting school in January and it's kind of freaky to think about, but I'm excited for the new challenge!

Decisions

2008-08-08T14:22:00.000-07:00

Okay! I totally am unsure if I should move or not. Since I told my boss, she has brought up some logical points. She suggests that I visit Vancouver as much as I need to and check out the singles wards. She also told me that if there were regional activities I wanted to go to, that I could take the time off to go. (She knows all the Mormon lingo by now.) She said she would rather me check it out, than to move and it not be what I'm looking for. Well.... logically that makes sense. But then the other part of me fights the logic with the fact that I have prayed about this move and received such a strong YES! And now, I feel like I can't pray anymore about it because I already got an answer. I really don't know why I get like this. AND, the other annoying part if you will, is that either way, I know I will be fine. I have a great job here, I can go to school starting in January during work time. That way I won't feel so stagnant and bored professionally. But I don't feel like there is a lot of opportunity to meet guys here.
Or, I could move, still start school in January and live in an area that is MUCH larger than Spokane.
I'm going crazy these past few days. I talked with Kelli, and she says that I probably wouldn't have so much anxiety about it if I should go right now. Mom says, maybe Heavenly Father doesn't care which way I go. I have thought all these things out. Different scenarios, all the what-ifs about staying and going. The pros and cons of staying and going... yet all I want to do is pull my freaking hair out!

By the way, Breaking Dawn was awesome and I really wish I could say more, but I won't since most of you haven't finished it! Hurry it on up! I need to read it again. lol
It's my dang happy place right now! My escape from insanity!

BREAKING DAWN!

2008-08-01T12:27:00.000-07:00

Oh my Edward, Oh my Edward! Tonight at midnight-oh-one, Breaking Dawn comes out. The fourth and tragically final installment of Twilight! I could read this story forever! I am so excited to read about the wedding............. lol. Should be some good times there!
Yes, I have a reserved copy of the book! I will be meeting up with about 6 different friends to go to Barnes and Noble at 11. We have to check in and wait there. I'm sure people will be there dressed up on some level. I'm not even wearing my Twilight shirt. (Yes, it's sometimes embarrassing to admit how obsessed I am!)
Abby and I will be lounging at her pool all day Saturday(pending good weather) and reading. My cell will either be on silent or I will just outright ignore most phone calls. Unless you want to call and tell me you're in love with me! hahahahahhaa. Inside joke!
Anyway, let the good times begin!

Audition Day!

2008-07-29T15:03:00.000-07:00

My day started with me getting up at 3:45am. We got in line at about 5am. The line was the most entertaining part of my day. People watching is quite fun for me. It was still nice and cool outside and I met a really nice man named Alan, an Arena employee. He was from Austrailia and totally hillarious.
So camera crews from different news stations and different tv shows were there. Justin Guarini or whatever his name is was there representing the TV Guide channel. Girls were screaming for him and squeeling, which as you can probably imagine, didn't annoy me whatsoever at 5am. Ha!
Marshall's sister called over to him to get a picture with him, so I snapped that picture. Then this girl in a quite----- um, interesting outfit hunted Justin down. She pretty much made him give her a TV interview. He asked her to sing Amazing Grace, and in her very valley girl tone and dialect said, "Um, I don't know that song." Blah, blah. Anyway, this interview was right next to me and at one point I noticed that the camera wasn't even filming. So I don't know if she will get what she wanted out of that process!
At about 8am, we start piling into the arena. We then find our seats and at that point the Fox workers have the crowd singing, Get Ready by The Temptations. We were all yelling, singing and screaming. This went on for about an hour. Then they finally busted out the audition tables and told us the rules. ....
4 people went up at a time to a judges table. 1 person at a time would step up, sing your song until you were given the hand to stop singing. Then the next one would go. After everyone was done, everyone stepped forward and they either said yes or no. If you were told no, you got your wristband snipped and out you went. If you got a yes, you had to go to a different area and spend about an hour or more being filmed and filling out paperwork.
So at about 1:30, Marshall and I got down to the floor, and at about 1:45 or so, stepped up in our line of 4 and auditioned.
I was really torn between singing Beautiful Disaster and At Last. So, when I stepped forward, out came Beautiful Disaster. I feel I did very well. I wasn't even nervous at all, (since you all know how much I wanted to be there anyway.) At this point, I was starving, had to pee and wanted out of that arena. While I was singing, the judge wouldn't look at me. In fact, she never looked at anyone while they were singing. So she called us all up to the table, told us "Thank you for coming. It's great that all of you were here. We couldn't do the show without you and you had some pretty solid performances. But we are looking for stronger singers this year for season 8. Have a good day."
So, as we walked out, (feeling completely relieved), Marshall starts screaming, "I'm free! Whoooooooo! As you can imagine, I was just loving being seen with him during his stupid moments. Well as we walk out, we get a camera slammed in our face asking us what we thought about auditions. Marshall continues on screaming in his obnoxious way, talking about how he needs to pee etc. Meanwhile, I'm shaking my head, completely embarrassed by him and saying something like, I really hope I don't get stuck on TV with him. The auditions were fun, its a long day and I'm ready to go home. We then had to hike up 8 flights of stairs to get out. lol.
So that is the end of the American Idol journey. I would never want to do it again. But it definitely is an experience, that's for sure!
Now I have to survive another 10 hour drive stuck in a car with Marshall. Pray I make it home safe.

2008-07-28T19:49:00.000-07:00

So, on the news today and in the newspaper, I was informed that Randy, Paula and Simon WILL NOT actually be here in Salt Lake!!!! How annoying! So this is what happens.
We show up at 5 am to get inside the building at who knows what time. I don't know how they determine who auditions and when. All those details are unclear.
There are 4 rounds that you have to get passed on through while here in Salt Lake. IF, you make it through all the rounds, then you sign a contract stating that you will return in September to appear before the judges. You sign that you will keep the same hair style, clothes and won't be tanner or lighter than before, etc.
So, I am feeling slightly annoyed at this process. I don't think it would be so bad, if people new what to expect. It's weird. Anyway, I'm off to bed. Must be up soon.

American Idol

2008-07-28T15:26:00.000-07:00

So on Sunday, July 27th, I stood in a line waiting to register for American Idol auditions. It took less than an hour. I got a nifty little red wristband, and a seat ticket to enter the Energy Solutions Arena. (Formerly the Delta Center)
I have to be in line tomorrow at 5 am. Doors don't open until 8 am. I have no idea what is going to happen tomorrow. We were told we had to learn 2 "audience participation" songs. Those are: Ain't no mountain high enough by Marvin Gaye and Get Ready by the temptations.
You know each season when they show all sorts of people singing the same song, random clips, I'm POSITIVE this is why we have to learn these songs. So I may be on the lame people clips, because I have no intention of trying to learn these songs by heart. I have some serious practicing to do ahead of time!
I will keep everyone posted!